I haven’t written anything about my memoir writing for a long time. Part of that is because I’ve only written on it sporadically. With my illustrator and publisher concerns with “Annie’s Special Day” and publishing posts for my blog, I have not been too serious about it. Also my grandson visited for a week twice in short succession. I’ll share photos of that when I learn how. I have submitted an article on personal essay in July and have been working on another children’s book. Like the title suggests, I’ve been too busy to write my memoir.
However, in a rare moment of leisure time the other day, I was browsing the net and came across Kathy Pooler’s blog, “WriteOn” (http://www.Krpooler.com/ ), about her writing a memoir which inspired me to write about my memoir. And it revived an interest in writing it. I thought I’d make time.
Recently I read Rikscott’s blog, “UphillWriting”, http://uphillwriting.org/2011/08/02/campnanowrimo.org/ and http://campnanowrimo.org/ and about national writing novel month or, NaNoWriMo; (http://nanowrimo.org/), which also encouraged me to write in my memoir as a test for the camp. I thought I’d see how long it would take to write the obligatory number of words for a day. I wrote three essays for a total of 1616 words and couldn’t find if that was near the daily standard or not. I also spell and grammar checked them with Word. Even though that wasn’t a requirement for the camp I didn’t want to put it in a folder with errors in it. That amount of words took pretty much a full day. It was harder than I thought.
The next day we had a family reunion a two-hour drive away in the Shenandoah Valley which took all day. When I came home in the evening, I only had time to look at email. No writing got done. I decided I’d wait for November to join Nanowrimo, the elected month for it, when I had more planning done and I can join in advance, not three days into it.
I’ve also been having spiritual issues with my memoir. These issues have kept me from my writing it. I believe the past (as well as the present) is an illusion designed by our egos to keep us believing that we are separated from God. If I constantly feed my ego by dipping into the past I feel I won’t grow closer to God but further away, unless I link forgiveness and love to my past. And that would be my theme, my purpose in writing it. That’s where the real work would begin. And so in the writing, as usual, about my memoir, I came to a conclusion and had an insight. Without forgiveness and love, my memoir would be just another rant, just another tough life story. So in order to write my story, I need to grow spiritually and I don’t know how to rush that while I’m having so much fun living.
“Better to write for yourself and have no public, than to write for the public and have no self.” Cyril Connolly
How about you? Do you have a project that’s been sitting on the back burner, or one that you work on sporadically?Have you ever had spiritual issues holding you back from writing something?